In the bleak midwinter

In the bleak midwinter, the family gathered and had a lovely Christmas. Diz phoned just after I'd finished the floor and we were off early - Angel and I in the back like taxi customers. Angel was a love, quiet and still and sociable with the sheepdog and the dalmatian we met at what used to be the Leicester Forest services, but it doesn't seem to have a name anymore.

Here's David whose beard has gone all bushy and voice has gone to his boots since the summer:

This is Abigail who has got the latest Pratchett and wasn't letting go in case anyone knicked it:

And this is everyone except me and Pete - Susan is in the middle of a story.

Now we're back and mum is with us. She is talking of being home be the 7th - cos the fish man is coming - but I'm hoping she extends it, she is very uncertain on her feet.

A hibernating people

I think that my most 'British' characteristic is my urge to hibernate. It's snowing properly today and radio 4s advice is "Stay at home." I'm still waiting to hear from Diz about what we are going to do. This is the present view from my back door. I've just cleared the snow from the greenhouse roof, fed the birds (though how long it will be before it is buried again, I don't know) and poured a kettle of boiling water on the bird bath.
I rushed back to get this shot so there are more foot prints in it - at least 2 sets of mine: It is so Narnia, I wish Sammy were still nine.

This is with the flash last night, cos it shows up the berries

and this is without, cos it shows the beautiful lighting from the street lights.

As I've been writing this, it has stopped - I don't know if I'm disappointed or pleased but I'd better get the kitchen floor washed, just in case!

I'm on message!

I'm on message! Mrs Brown is NOT buying wrapping paper this year but is using newspaper. I wonder if she's bid for the Guardian originals for those special gifts? I have remembered to save the sheets and know that I'm giving Tutu's to Josie, but haven't got much further than thinking about it.

Amazement!

We (they [radio 4 announcers]) are always being amazed at how badly we deal with the winter and spend hours trying to explain/justify it. Do they really think their audience haven't lived through a British winter before, or listened to radio 4 before, or maybe they think that with their listener profile we have all lost huge chunks of memory and need telling all this again. We do it badly, we do - it's 'cos we don't really suffer from the chaos, we abandon cars and panic and complain and it gives us something to do to justify ignoring people for whom not bothering is fatal.

'Little Bits' says "Thank heaven for the mobile phone" - maybe she wouldn't have dared to run out of petrol with a baby in the car in pre-mobile days, maybe she'd've had to take more care.

Out in the snow the black birds and pigeons are busy being territorial instead of eating; squabbling instead of searching for food - if I fed them less they might co-operate better. This was going on out there while in here, Radio 4 (a different program now) was talking about the American attitude to climate change which seems to be, 'let them worry about it, we're not going to do anything because we're not suffering.' Reminds me of "Sheep look up" by, I think, JG Ballard.

So I turned to Radio 7 and listened to 1970s comedy while I cleaned the kitchen.

This is my favourite bit at the moment, though the stewpot is missing 'cos it's in the fridge. I'm not suffering either which is why I'm pondering all this. The stewpot has chicken thighs in it - for Angel. But I do feel remote from the future-threat not only because I don't feel it yet but also because at my age and with no children, I can afford not only to be a bit objective, but a bit selfish too. When push comes to shove, I'll be among the first off the cliff, so I may as well enjoy now. As Angel does. This is her reaction to hearing the fridge door open. See her run:

Snow at last

The snow has arrived. Angel spent a lot of the 10pm walk trying to catch the shadow of snowflakes. Our street has the new white lights so the shadows showed up beautifully



She had her coat on cos I was worried about her fur not being plentiful enough to repel the snow and when we got in she had ice between her pads, which didn't come off on the towel but melted all over the chair so I'll remember to check for that in future.
It had stopped by this morning though the radio promises more. I didn't get round to posting the bought cards (or even writing them) so this is a possible:

Blair blur

This is following on from yesterday's rant - I'm looking for a new label but haven't got one yet - maybe questions or thinking out loud??
Last week, it was reported on Radio 4 (and so must be true) that Tony Blair said that his religious belief had no influence on his decision to invade Iraq. I've been puzzling at it since. Did he mean that:
it took a nanosecond to make the decision
or that he did think about it but went against what he believes is right
or that what he believes is right has nothing to do with his religion?
Whatever the reason it makes both him and his claim to be converted to anything other than "whatever is most expedient in the struggle for Tony Blair to have public power" even less credible.
I've got a new label and am going to retrospectly (?) apply it, if I can.

Modelling the teddy cut

Here she is, post haircut:

and with the latest entertainment - a pop sock. It's a bit like children, I guess, spend money on toys and they play with the packaging - Angel likes: a stick that she's wound wool round - her knitting, a skin polisher that she nicked from the bathroom - her noo-noo, and now a pop sock that my mum hasn't named yet so it's still just her pop-sock.

She was wonderful at 'The Lamppost'. The loss of hair has obviously affected her body temperature - she spent the rest of the day asleep (it's exhausting being beautified)curled as tight as a comma.

For or against

This may be because I'm trying to write through feeling fragile - so if the bile shows, sorry!
There are those who support because they are:

for the thing

against 'not the thing'.

The Leeds supporters I shared the bus with the other Saturday set me on this track. The crew nearest me favoured "You are my sunshine" as a pre-match warm up, towards the front it was "There'll be ten in red, dead at my feet". Although they did all join in "We hate Man U, we do, we do." That is one sentiment that unites all Leeds fans. I used to work with someone whose husband would rather his son wore a green dress than a red T-shirt.
Then, reading Rob Bell and the faith that defines itself by exclusions came to mind. I'd rather a faith that includes. He says, I think - I can't find it this morning to check - if it's true, it's from God. I like that - that's inclusive and walks straight through other labels.
Sitting at dinner last night (not responsible for the fragility except for piling rich food on rich food) trying to hear the truth and work out why I reject the BNP without knowing much about it, I think it is maybe about its base being anti not-like-us, the same reason for rejecting Jehovah's Witnesses' pattern of faith.
I need to work on this more. For now I'm going to close my eyes and fight off the sickies for ten minutes!

Where does the time go?

This is the last week of creative writing and Chinese. Maybe in the Christmas break I'll catch up, or maybe not!

Today Angel goes for her hair cut. This is how she looked after a walk in the wet this morning:

We meet a whippet called Bonnie on our 10pm walk. They're like Audrey Hepburn and Marilyn Monroe (or Katherine Hepburn and Diana Dors) and imagine what each would look like without their fur coats on - Audrey in suede and Marilyn in mink. So I don't know whether to push for the plush look or if she'll look like no more nor less than a sofa. Thinking of Marilyn this is my mum looking like Norma Jean at 90 might:

She was posing for the Guardian Camera Club November assignment for me.

I've been reading 'Velvet Elvis' by Rob Bell - Howard lent it me but I think I'm going to buy my own copy. Faith is jumping on a trampoline. I can remember that exhileration and it is what my faith is. Church dogma are the springs, Howard, Gunita, David and the rest are the people round the edges to make sure I feel safe to jump and Jesus is up there jumping with me - making me go higher and wilder than I ever could on my own. WOW!